@matigo I KNOW RIGHT
regarding 1) --- oh my goodness it is SO BAD. with the two recent examples in teh past week that I have, there's a combination of power differential as well as reasonably functional-seeming person paired with creepy or questionable person
regarding 2) --- UGH there is like NOTHING you can do. if you draw attention to it they just think you're pretending not to be into them. and I don't even understand why they think I'm into me anyway?!